Tagged: obsessive compulsive disorder

i was never good

i was never good
at guessing the number of
jelly beans in a

jar, and so began the habit
of counting everything else

counters have a hard

counters have a hard
time comprehending non-counters –
what do you mean you

don’t know how many, how much,
when we will run out, what’s enough?


(for j because of p)

every couple of months, you
call and ask me to help you move
some furniture around in your
house, starting with the bed.
you say you just can’t get to
sleep anymore surrounded
by all these corners and
varying degrees of nearly right
angles. with the phone in
one hand, a bottle of Jägermeister
sticking frozen to the other
you say please,
please come – i feel i’m getting
closer to the truth this time.
and as your life-long girlfriend
with the perpetually
convenient back problem sits
decorating wallflowers
against the kitchen counter, we
move the bed, the dresser,
the lamp, the couch,
the television stand, and
on and on, until those spirits
haunting you cannot recognize
this as home anymore. but
you were the one who made
the pact with the devil, and
after a month or two, it’s just
going to be the same thing again

the symmetry in unexpected things:

the stem of an apple
sharply sliced

the colour within
your coldness
faintly flushed

the letter o
to stand still
next to the letter u

the sound of snow
their gut differences
to clump
in hushed harmony